Using the Bathroom

There are some things that America just does the best.  Examples: fried food, freedom, soft drinks, SUVs, and liberty.  Also, democracy. Also, bathrooms are one of those things.

Here is a selfie of me in a bathroom

Now I'm not pointing any fingers here, 

Actually, I lied.  I totally am.  My bad.

but some countries could stand to learn a few things from America, and one of those is Italy.  Now, Italy's great: the people are awesome, the food is awesome, even their terrible president is more amusing than ours

I have the intelligence of George W. Bush combined with the licentiousness of Bill Clinton!

Unfortunately, the bathrooms (which they call the "toilette", from French I think) are somewhat confusing and, I might also say, worse.  I think that's a bit harsh - we can all deal with things like this - but still.  Here's my reasoning:

1. Bidet: this is a fixture (not an appliance really, is it?) that for me has no application whatsoever.  It just sits there taking up space.

sup

What it looks like is a combination sink/urinal, but in actuality it is used for "washing the genetalia, inner buttocks, and anus".  

umm... 

Okay, actually I'm starting to feel bad for it now.  That's a terrible, terrible job.  I guess you can stay.

2. Washing machine:  The washing machine is actually alright - it's kind of confusing, but has a function where you can set it to run after a few hours so you can wash your clothes while you're at work or something, which is pretty cool.  The downside is that they heavily outnumber the dryers, which means you have to hangdry your clothes.  In the summer, that's great.  That fresh scent will lift your spirits day after day.  In the winter, however, you have to hang them on these racks

which actually do a fairly decent job.  The one problem is that it's pretty cold in my room, so the clothes that don't go on the rack (like socks, for instance) will take much longer to dry.  That is to say, they are still moist after 2 days.

It's not all bad, though.  The toilets here are more environmentally friendly, since you can stop the flush if you don't need to wash that much down, and they also use less water in general.  Actually, everything would be perfect if they just swapped the bidet out for a dryer.  That's all I'm saying really.